Everything just keeps falling further and further behind. I'm behind in school, homework and everything else. I never have the time to study or do homework. I'm always working and tired. I know things will get better but life really sucks right now. All this weekend I was babysitting and all I got was $56, that's it! I am never babysitting on the weekends, that's the time I can do my homework and study and crap I have to do.
The more people encourage Heather to make baking in to a career, the more I get upset. I was supposed to be the one that became a baker, it was going to be a way to release my creativity and do something fun. But I don't want to always be competing with Heather for first. It's not that I want to compete in the first place, but there will always be competition, because both of us were never good enough for our parents or family so we will want to be better and have that feeling of being better at something. I am just so down, because this weekend she baked a cake for the birthday party we were at and every one was saying how good it was and just kept going on and she felt good but i feel like shit.
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Monday, October 01, 2007
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